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24 Mar 05

i’ve saved up the funny

i’ve been saving up the funny for the last couple days, so here’s a few stories that made me giggle this week. and yes, giggling is quite masculine.

1. as i was walking to work on monday morning, there was an assy teenaged skateboarder skating up and down the middle of alfred street in front of kcvi. for those of you who aren’t in the know, alfred is pretty well travelled in the mornings, so he was constantly forcing cars to swerve around him while he was listening to his ipod in full oblivious mode. the fun began when a school bus pulled up in front of the school and stopped beside where he’d left his coat on the curb. he was behind me at this point, but all of a sudden i heard him yelling and running towards me as the bus pulled away: his coat had gotten snagged to the bus and was being dragged away. to add to the comedy gold, he inexplicably left his skateboard in the middle of alfred as he ran off after his coat. i’m not sure if he ever got his coat back, nor am i sure if his skateboard survived. is it wrong to hope that both are lost forever?

2. while i was driving to toronto last friday afternoon, i drove past a van on the 401 labelled “donovan plumbing”. their slogan? if you sh*t today, thank a plumber. genius. sadly, their “website” has amended this slightly to if you flush today, thank a plumber. doesn’t have quite the same ring to it.

3. when my sister first sent me a jpeg of her ultrasound, i immediately pointed out the obvious: her baby closely resembled an alien. see for yourself:

her response was, predictably, “thank you for calling my baby an alien”. anyway, few people denied what i pointed out, and rightly so. have a look at pregnancy.org’s pregnancy calendar, paying special attention to this past monday (march 21st). that’s right. even pregnancy.org acknowledges that her baby was other-worldly.

One Response to “i’ve saved up the funny”

  1. 1
    Donovan Plumbing Says:

    HEY THERE!!!! Just googled our company and your site was the first listed. The slogan came after the website when we decided to push the envolope just a bit. It’s great to see that a good sense of humour is appreciated, and thanks for posting!!!!! We will be updating our site soon.

    Patrick and Heather Donovan
    Donovan Plumbing

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Pronunciation: 'ch&mp
Function: noun
Etymology: perhaps blend of chunk and lump
Date: 1883

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