chumptastic dot org

Archive for February, 2004

29 Feb 04

more downtime

for those of you who tried to access chumptastic yesterday, i apologize. cogeco randomly changed its IP address yesterday for the first time in 2 years, so i had to update its dns record. i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again: stupid cogeco.

anyway, when i came home last night i noticed a bike locked up in the lobby of my building. note how secure it is:


i feel like moving it outside complete with the newspaper box.

25 Feb 04

i can now manage your projects with one hand tied behind my back

i spent 7 hours yesterday in a project management training session. the material wasn’t terrible (although somewhat less than enthralling), but the day really did a good job in emphasizing how little i like a lot of the people i work with. oh, and how difficult is it to draw a gantt chart?

fun fact: the session facilitator was a three-day champion on jeopardy. cool.

24 Feb 04

chumptastic clipart – take 2

mitch has outdone herself in her attempts to create clipart likenesses of us:

so freakishly good. be sure to view the fullsized picture of me to get the full effect – note the hand-drawn salteens shirt and chumptastic on the computer screen.

we’re totally making t-shirts out of these.

23 Feb 04

i finally winterluded

after a couple years of wanting to go, i finally got my chance to attend winterlude yesterday. a carload of us made the trek to ottawa and spend much of the afternoon skating up and down the canal. oh, and i can’t forget to mention the yummy beaver tails and cider – and the snow taffy for those who need more sugar in their diets. it was a fun and exhausting day, in spite of the “fair to poor” ice conditions (and that assessment is, in my estimation, generous – but at least we didn’t fall through at any point). photographic evidence is still to come.

on another note, we should all be sure to give patrick some advice on his really disturbing questions. and also phone his mom.

19 Feb 04

blogerific

well, just about everyone i know seems to have created a blog or website in the last month. here’s a quick rundown before i add a links section to my page again:

robin
sofi
anne
mitch

it’s clear: everyone wants to be like me.

18 Feb 04

more hockey dominance

with all of the excitement about the cease and desist letter, i forgot to mention scotto and tim’s latest hockey triumph. jo and i took a roadtrip to millbrook on monday evening to watch their dominance over poor peterborough (who were, incidentally, resplendent in “zellers” jerseys) in a 4-1 win. scott scored the first goal of the game, and tim missed a sure goal, i think just to spite me. i’d also like to point out that there wasn’t nearly as much fighting as i’d promised jo, so we both left disappointed.

17 Feb 04

i’m ceasing and desisting

well, it was bound to happen sooner or later. in the same month that i pissed off rob page, i’ve also apparently caught the attention of city tv’s lawyers by posting those embarassing gord martineau clips.

so, it’s with a certain degree of pride (and perhaps fear) that i may announce my first ever cease and desist order! that’s right, one of CHUM limited’s lawyers emailed me today explaining that i’m a bad bad person…so of course i will share that letter with you (and also comply because really, i’m not an idiot):

page 1
page 2

so there you have it. chumptastic is officially mainstream. and really, you’re not much of a blog until you’ve been threatened with legal action, are you?

16 Feb 04

ravishing a universe for love

having seen this, now i kinda wanna ravish a universe for love.

13 Feb 04

stars and more hatred

wednesday night was the much anticipated stars show at the grad club. i’d seen them once before, last year with broken social scene, and they kicked bss’s ass energywise and performancewise. needless to say i was looking forward to it.

much like the last time i saw them, the show didn’t get underway until late. it wasn’t quite as late as the by divine right fiasco of last week, but for a wednesday night an 11:10 start is pretty late for me (in this case, the opening band’s car accident en route can be blamed). the openers were called marlowe, and they impressed – picture broken social sceney’s more mellow stuff with a female singer. not bad at all. stars’ set was amazing as expected, full of energy and songs about fucking (in their words). i quite enjoyed amy millan’s drunken antics, including dropping her guitar on the floor and “playing” it while bending down thus making herself bleed, and telling a long (and very un-hendrix story, according to torq) about how hard it is to get into queen’s.

anyway, the show was good, but i’d like to take this opportunity to discuss people who clearly have no concert etiquette. so, here is a list of people i hate:

  • the guy with the pseudo messy hair and stripey shirt – stars sing love songs. your 80s metal fist pumps did NOT fit in, and were very mockworthy…you looked like the stereotypical my-first-concert-guy. your faux-messy hair loses its effect when you spend the evening primping it to make sure it’s just messy enough. and dammit, stop elbowing me. (an aside – i was about to describe this guy to jo yesterday while eating lunch in biosci when he walked by wearing the exact same shirt. convenient.)
  • jason schwartzman wannabe – you are 6’4 and you feel the need to stand in the front row? don’t push past people under 5’5 just to stand at the front and tap your foot.
  • mr messy hair’s large sadies-loving friend – if you weigh >250 and you are so drunk that you’re wobbling, please, for the sake of public safety, get away from the crowd. same goes for the case where you are so drunk that you look ready to vomit at any moment.
  • library girl and boyfriend, standing against the side wall – it’s great that you are familiar with the stars’ material, but was it really necessary to come up with actions to the songs? oh, and making out every 30 seconds was a bit unnecessary as well.
  • the guy drinking hot tea in the middle of the crowd – all it takes is one drunken elbow and someone gets scaldy.

who’d i miss?

and hey, i figure if i’ve already offended my name twin this week, i might as well offend everyone at queen’s one by one.

13 Feb 04

php is my friend

hey look, chumptastic is now completely php-ized!
spot the differences for a nickel…and…go!

Pronunciation: 'ch&mp
Function: noun
Etymology: perhaps blend of chunk and lump
Date: 1883

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