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Archive for May, 2003

19 May 03

good day

guess what i woke up to today? you might recall (but probably not) the street sweeper who spent two solid nights zamboniing the parking lots outside my building last year around this time, and robin commented last night that i haven’t had the pleasure of experiencing that yet this year. sure enough, there were two of them this morning starting around 10:30 or so. i guess it could’ve been worse.

today was beyond gorgeous, which made it perfect weather for biking, throwing around a softball and getting ice cream down by the water. good day.

19 May 03

i have one life to live

i’m thinking seriously of joining this group. i mean, how can i resist? it combines two of my favourite things: role playing games and soap operas. i’m in heaven.

18 May 03

my popularity was fleeting

ahh, that’s more like it. 55 and 45 visitors in the last two days. the world isn’t going crazy after all.

17 May 03

i’m the kiss of death

i should stop cheering for hockey teams. it appears to be their kiss of death.

i saw the matrix last night, like everyone else in the world. i enjoyed it…not as much as the first one, but it was still pretty ok. that’s saying a lot since the first thing i thought after seeing the first one was “wow, i hope they don’t make a sequel”. i also dropped by the toucan for a little bit last night…it wasn’t the same.

friday night was danny michel at the grad club. i really enjoyed his solo show back in october, so i was looking forward to seeing him with a full band. they were quite good, but the crowd was the WORST crowd i’d ever seen. most were MBA students who couldn’t care less about the band, so they spent their time talking loudly and occasionally yelling at the band. it was clear that danny wasn’t overly enamoured with the crowd, and i can’t blame him. this was evidenced by his question to the crowd “how many of you are here because you’ve heard of me, and how many of you are just here for something to do?” the reaction was mixed.

15 May 03

no, i do NOT circumcize teenagers

what’s going on? why did chumptastic have 111 visitors yesterday? i guess the word is out… i’m not sure WHAT word, but i’m hoping it’s the fuck word. it appears as though more search engines have indexed me finally, so maybe that’s the cause. regardless, 111 visitors is twice as many as i’m used to. good thing i don’t have much interesting to say or i might be faced with bandwidth concerns.

in other news, i unwittingly started a (kind of disgusting) debate about circumcision ages ago. freddyfromenfield is the most recent member of the interweb to weigh in on this always interesting issue. in all seriousness though, did people not even READ the post they’re replying to? it has nothing to do with circumcision!

14 May 03

i needed some retrofitting

i think i have a new least favourite way to start a day. picture this:

i was running a bit late this morning, mainly because i was being lazy. as i was getting out of the shower i heard a loud knock at my door…i was kind of half-expecting this ’cause when i left my apartment yesterday morning there was a note attached to my door telling me that workers would be arriving sometime between 8 and 4 today to “retrofit my apartment” with fire alarm stuff. so, they chose to come at 8. i let them in and they immediately opened my closet. here’s the conversation that ensued:

greasy construction worker guy: you were supposed to take everything out of your closet.
me: i was? how was i supposed to know that?
gcwg: your pantry too. we’re running conduit through there *pointing to the top of my closet and along my ceiling*
me: it said nothing about this on the letter i got yesterday.
gcwg: yes it did.
me: no. it didn’t. *shows him the fucking letter*
gcwg: oh, well, our supervisor went from apartment to apartment to tell everyone what they need to do.
me: uh, no. i was here when the letter got dropped off and i spoke with no one.
gcwg: well, we can just empty your closet for you…
me: uhhhhh. no.

so yeah, i emptied the top of my closet and the top two shelves of my pantry thing, as instructed, and i did so quite hurriedly ’cause i was already a bit late. when i got home, i discovered that they’d removed the rest of my stuff for me, and it was strewn across my couch, floor, counter tops and stove.

and the best part: all they did was run conduit. they haven’t installed the actual fire alarm, like the letter said. i.e., they’ll be coming back again. can’t wait.

14 May 03

mmm, popcorn

looking at the title of the previous post, i’m reminded of the classic snl spoof of jeopardy, in which the category is “the pen is mightier”. of course, connery misreads it as “the penis mightier”.

anyway, a conversation with robin tonight about the crazy number of breakins around campus lately reminded me of my favourite ever posting on the queen’s security incidents page, from back in 1998:

June 28 Mackintosh-Corry Hall (02:10 pm): A custodial staff member called the ERC to report there was a male outside MacCorry, near the loading area, with his pants down. The individual had been collecting cigarette butts and was now standing in a tree picking cherries with his pants down and whistling at passing females. The Security Supervisor was dispatched and Kingston Police were asked to attend. The Security Supervisor attended and was joined shortly by a Kingston Police Officer. They approached the individual and asked what he was doing on Queen’s property. He replied that he was collecting cigarette butts because he eats them (remarking that they “taste like popcorn”). When asked why he’d had his pants down and about the whistling at females he denied doing anything of the sort. The male was served with a campus wide Notice of Prohibition by Campus Security and he said he would not return. The Kingston Police Officer reported they could not do anything because they did not catch him committing a criminal act.

i can just imagine the security guys in hysterics while typing that.

as an aside: this is only interesting to me, but for some reason i had more visitors yesterday (tuesday) than ever before. i’m still not in the slashdot or cnn.com range, but 98 visits in a day is a whole lot for chumptastic. i’m guessing it was mostly people looking for info on john stamos and circumcizing teenagers.

13 May 03

knife of its penis a penis? my thoughts exactly!

so, i got home from work today and discovered something different about the hallway outside my door:


yeah, my carpet’s now gone. you may recall the day that i got home to find my ceiling missing – i guess they’re still not done screwing with me.

work today was a bit on the sucky side. i spent 3+ hours in an excruciatingly hot computer lab trying to figure out why the network wasn’t working, only to discover that someone had misconfigured the switch. again. predictable i guess.

in addition, we got our softball schedule today, and our first game appears to be next week. 3 things are wrong with this:
a) it’s a week earlier than normal, and if the weather doesn’t drastically improve by then i’ll need my winter coat to play.
b) it’s at the shittiest field in the city: complete with a hill in the outfield, and a lake behind the backstop. the lake is nice when it’s hot out, but at this time of year all it does is make you even colder.
c) it’s against the team we played against twice last year, and both games ended in arguments. dread.

in other, more bizarre news:
sofi received a spam email today with the subject line “Faca de seu penis um P┬áNIS”. i ran this through babel fish and discovered it’s portuguese for “Knife of its penis a PENIS”. riiiiight.

and finally, i was just watching the news and thought i heard this news item wrong, but apparently not: according to our most recent census, canada has 20 thousand people who claimed their religion as “jedi”. insert your own joke here.

12 May 03

enfin j’ai gagne mon permis de conduire!

i just thought i’d point out that el scotto, the 16 year old, is about 2 months away from his G2 test (for you americans, i’m talking about driving here). my plan is to get him to drive my car to pick up robin and jo in the summer. note that they’re both about 7 years older than him, and he’s further along in his pursuit of legal driving than they are. now THAT would be funny.

12 May 03

post-weekend post

hmm, i sure have done a lot since i last posted. at least, a lot by my standards. usually i just sit and stare at my wall until it’s time to go to work.

anyway, over the weekend i saw a mighty wind (it was quite good, perhaps not as good as best in show or waiting for guffman, but still funny – more of a “real movie” than guest’s other work) and xmen 2 (also pretty good, better than the first installment). i also went on a bike shopping adventure/fiasco with mitch and robin, watched some hockey, and did a whirlwind tour of peterborough for my dad’s birthday and mothers’ day.

even my busy weekends are boring.

Pronunciation: 'ch&mp
Function: noun
Etymology: perhaps blend of chunk and lump
Date: 1883

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